Godly Communication

"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear." Ephesians 4:29

I've been preparing for the ladies' Bible study, and I'm thankful for the way in which C. J. Mahaney unpacks this verse, one phrase at a time, in chapter nine of Humility: True Greatness. Supposedly, we average around twenty-five thousand words per day, but how often do we stop to consider the power we wield with those words. God designed our speech with power for the primary purpose of building others up.

The first command is to "let no corrupting talk come out of our mouths." The Greek word for "corrupting" is the same word used to describe decaying food. God is forbidding us from using speech that is death-giving, rather than life-giving. We immediately think of our words that are false, slanderous, degrading, vulgar, etc. "But now with the phrase 'corrupting talk' he (Paul) introduces a broader category. He's referring to any and all communication that deters growth in godliness; any speech that hinders the cultivation of godly relationships; any words that have a deadening or dulling effect on the soul of another." (p. 113)

The second command is to have speech that is "good for building up," words that edify others. Mahaney wisely notes that edifying words are not simply polite words, words of flattery, or compliments that are man-centered. "Truly edifying words are words that reveal the character and the promises and the activity of God. They're cross-centered words. They're words rooted in and derived from Scripture, words that identify the active presence of God, and words that communicate the evidences of grace that you observe in others. They're words that flow from a humble heart." (p. 114) To effectively practice edifying speech though, we must know something about the person with whom we're speaking. Through studying them, asking questions, and listening, we should be able to discern what he or she currently needs in the way of counsel, exhortation, warning, comfort, or forgiveness.

Lastly, Paul instructs that our speech have purpose, "that it may give grace to those who hear." We all need grace, and we should all strive to be ministers of grace one to another. Mahaney writes: "So let us pray, 'Lord, help me discern what kind of grace this person needs.' For those who are legalistic or feel condemned, we want to bring justifying grace into their souls. To those struggling with a besetting sin, we want to bring sanctifying grace. To those experiencing suffering, we want to bring comforting grace. To those who are just weary, we want to refresh their souls with sustaining grace. The list goes on." (p. 118)