As Joel and I are going through this time of transition from Michigan to Kansas, I'm discovering that I am more of a worry wort than I ever thought possible. Even though I can recite several related Bible verses, my emotions are not in sync with what I know to be true. I'm beginning to remind myself of my grandmother, who seemed to occupy her days looking for worry subject matter. That's not a good thing.
First it was the cats. How are we ever going to transport Phoebe and Beatrice over one thousand miles over two days when they pitch a meow fit just going one mile to the vet? Will we be able to find a suitable pet-friendly motel? How will the cats react to staying in a motel? And what about their reaction to our new home? How will they respond to the residual scent of the four cats who currently live there? Will we be cleaning up markings all over the house?
Then I directed my worry to the fact that since we haven't sold our home here in Michigan, we might have to leave it unattended for several months until it sells. Who is going to take care of the mowing and the falling leaves in our large yard as we go into autumn? And what if its not sold before winter? How will we handle the snow removal? Should we program the lights so the house looks inhabited? And at what temperature should we set the furnace before we leave?
I rest my case.
As I was cleaning yesterday, I noticed the book by R. C. Sproul, Jr. that we bought on the Ligonier cruise - Believing God: 12 Biblical Promises Christians Struggle to Accept. I thought surely he has something to say about worry or anxiety. As I glanced through the contents, there it was, chapter 9 - "All Things Work Together," based on Romans 8:28: And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. R. C., Jr. began the chapter by telling of his struggle with anxiety over a trip to Southeast Asia. It helped me put our move to Kansas in perspective. He then discussed his two part "internal liturgy" that he goes through when confronted with life challenges:
Part One:
1. What's the worst that could happen?
2. Whatever the worst thing is, it's not that bad.
Part Two:
1. What am I due?
"It is all too easy for us to lose sight of what we are. We move through this world forgetting that we are, in ourselves, an unhappy joining together of dust and rebellion. Because of our rebellion, we look at the world and its Maker as if we are owed peace and comfort. The truth of the matter is that no matter what kind of hardship we might find ourselves going through, every human on the planet . . . moves through his days in a context of unfathomable grace . . . What we are due is eternal torment. This is what God owes us, according to a strict standard of justice." (p. 91)
2. What have I been given?
"Here we enter into the depth of the blessing God has given us. We enjoy much more than merely not getting what we deserve. We receive from Him our daily bread. We enjoy relationships with people we love. We are all richly blessed." (p. 92)
3. What have I been promised?
"When I take my eyes off my troubles and look instead to God's promises, my troubles melt in a sea of joy . . . We will see Him as He is. We will be with Him. We will be like Him. We will enjoy at His right hand pleasures forevermore . . . How can we despair when He who made all things, whose word is truth, promises us that our joy will be such that no eye has seen it, no ear has heard it, and it has not entered our minds to think it." (p. 93)
But there's more to this point:
"Our calling isn't to suffer through our threescore and ten, knowing that things will get better in the end and make all our suffering worthwhile. We do not manage this hardship or that by means of a promise about the future promise. We do so in light of a present promise, a present reality. The good news isn't that we can endure a present hardship because of future blessing. The good news is that the hardship itself is, according to biblical promise, the blessing." (p. 93)
How so?
That's where Romans 8:28 comes in. Do I believe God's promise that He is working through this stressful time in our lives for our good and His glory? Do I remember that my purpose on this earth is different from those outside the kingdom of God? R. C. explains: "If . . . we understand . . . that our end is something more significant than personal peace and affluence, then we can begin to see how these hardships might in fact be good things. The Westminster Shorter Catechism . . . begins with this question: 'What is the chief end of man?' It answers, 'Man's chief end is to glorify God, and to enjoy him for ever.'" (p. 95) We exist that God's glory might be made manifest and that we might delight in Him always." If we are in Christ, all the events of our lives are helping us grow in grace, as we are becoming more like Him. R. C. refers to our sanctification as our "Jesus-ification." I like that.
It is my prayer that through this time of transition, I will trust that each day is part of the Heavenly Father's plan to "Jesus-fy" me. I want to see the blessings of sanctification along the way, rather than only focus on the joy to be realized at the end of the journey. To Him be the glory.
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