Anger

We all can relate. Someone acts in a sinful way, and we respond in anger. We might even try to justify it as "righteous anger," because God's moral law has been violated. But we have to look at the motive behind our sin. Are we really concerned about God's will, or are we more concerned about how that action affects us? Has our pride been wounded? Are we being selfish in demanding our way? James 4:1 says, "Where do wars and fights come from among you? Do they not come from your desires for pleasure that war in your members? Anger is a serious sin, and uncontrolled anger can lead to even more grievous sins. With the power of the Holy Spirit though, we can respond to any unjust treatment as "mindful of God." Jerry Bridges wrote: "To be mindful of God means to think of God's will and God's glory. How would God have me respond in this situation? How can I best glorify God by my response? Do I believe that this difficult situation or unjust treatment is under the sovereign control of God and that in His infinite wisdom and goodness He is using these difficult circumstances to conform me more to the likeness of Christ?" I know in the heat of a situation, this thinking might not be at the forefront of our mind, but we should develop the habit of thinking this way.

I think back to the summer of 2005, a very difficult summer for our family. The trials seemed to come one right after another, and I wasn't handling each one very well. I was harboring bitterness over the emotional pain and financial losses that were out of my control. Toward the end of summer, we had a really nice vacation to Kansas and Colorado, and things seemed to be looking up. But on our way home, we had another "car incident" in a small town in eastern Colorado. It was a Sunday afternoon, and we were stranded until we could get the car fixed on Monday (which required renting a car and driving to a city 100 miles away to get the part). Once we got to a motel, I released all the pent up bitterness and anger in the form of sobbing and walking around the motel property. Poor Joel and Tyler didn't know what to do with me. All the while though, I was trying to get a grip by reminding myself of Romans 8:28. Besides repenting of my anger at the situation, I had to repent of not handling the situation in a manner that honored God. At that moment, I wasn't trusting in His sovereignty, wisdom, and love. We are never justified in being angry with God. Bridges says, "Anger is a moral judgment, and in the case of God, it accuses Him of wrongdoing. It accuses God of sinning against us by neglecting us or in some way treating us unfairly. It also is often a response to our thinking that God owes us a better deal in life than we are getting."

Jerry Bridges offers this wisdom in handling anger in a God-honoring way:

1. Recognize and acknowledge that our anger is sin.
2. Examine why we became angry. Was it pride, selfishness, or an idol of the heart? If so, we need to repent of the anger and the reason for the anger.
3. Change our attitude toward the person(s) whose words or actions triggered the anger. (Ephesians 4:32, Colossians 3:13)
4. Seek the forgiveness of the person we have wounded with our anger.
5. We need to hand over to God the occasion of our anger, realizing that any given situation that tempts us to anger can drive us either to sinful anger or to Christ and His sanctifying power.

(Jerry Bridges' thoughts taken from Respectable Sins: Confronting the Sins We Tolerate.)